For Better or For Worse (Wedding Vows) Read online

  She snuggled into his side. He put his arm around her shoulder, then thought, why not? He leaned in and kissed her. On the lips. A tender kiss, the kind he knew would charm the panties right off a woman. Her hand reached up and she surrounded him with her arms, gripping him so tightly she was close to leaving claw marks.

  Then her hands eased around to the front of his shoulders, and she gave him a push. Just enough so he knew he needed to back off, but not enough for anyone else to detect.

  “Please don’t do that,” she whispered.

  “Why not?” Was it too hard to resist? Was he tempting her?

  She didn’t answer, just pulled away and leaned her head on the back of the leather seat. Her eyes closed, and her eyelashes formed a beautiful, thick fan over the tops of her cheeks.

  He had to look away, or he was going to be in pain. The car started moving, and he gazed at the businesses passing by, most of them closed, dark interiors and shuttered entrances.

  “When can we buy your ring?”

  “Mm. Tomorrow should be fine.” She still hadn’t opened her eyes. If she stayed like that, she was going to be asleep before they got home.

  He took her hand in his and squeezed it softly. “You know I want you to be happy.”

  “Mm.”

  “I love you.”

  “Mm.”

  Dang, was she even listening? Had the words registered? “I want to stay with you for the rest of my life.”

  “Mm.”

  “How do you feel about that?”

  Silence. Then a soft snort and slow breathing. Her head lolled.

  “Rest well.”

  CHAPTER 10

  Dad called the next day. “Hey, kiddo, heard you got a new guy friend chasin’ after ya.”

  She chuckled. “And doing a pretty good job of it, too.”

  “Oh, really. Handsome fella, huh?”

  “Looks a lot like you.” Satisfaction filled her. Not only would that please Dad, but, she realized, it was true. There were certain parts of his face, a certain number of expressions he wore, that gave her the same kind of warm feelings she had always gotten from Dad.

  “Well, you can’t beat that with a stick.”

  “But I have more news,” she said, forcing her voice to sound excited, delighted.

  “Yeah? Well, don’t keep me waitin’.”

  She bit her lip. Maybe it was still too soon. Maybe her parents would think she’d gone off the deep end. Maybe… damn it, she didn’t have any choice. Things were moving too quickly, and she had to bring her parents along. Either that, or just get married without them, then tell them she had eloped.

  She couldn’t do that to them. And anyway, she wanted them to come be with her.

  “Last night,” she said, then rolled her hands into a fist. Do it. Say it!

  “You went on a fabulous date?”

  “Yes. But wait! There’s more!”

  He laughed, that wonderfully deep, sonorous sound that took her back to memories of pillow fights and nerf guns. “Hit me with it, kiddo.”

  “Last night, he proposed to me.”

  Silence.

  More silence.

  “Are you still there?”

  “Sweetheart, how long have you known this character?”

  “Come on, Dad. It’s not about how long. It’s how well we know each other.”

  “Don’t try to fast talk me, young lady.”

  “Dad, please. I want you to be happy for me. Don’t ruin my big event.”

  Another moment of silence passed, except for that loud huffing, that hit so hard it sounded like an explosion. She pulled the phone away from her ear for a second.

  “Look, hon, I know it’s your life, and I want you to be happy. But dang it, can’t I still give you a little advice?”

  “Well, maybe if it’s not something I already expect you to say.”

  More explosions. Sounded like he was in a war zone. “Okay, then,” he said finally. “When’s the date? And do you want me to tell your mama, or should I?”

  ✽✽✽

  Another trip to the mall in the limousine. Diane just couldn’t get Jason to start acting more like a normal person, like someone she could be comfortable around. He was flaunting his money, apparently under the delusion that it would make her want him more. But it just made her feel inadequate.

  Although she did like having maids taking care of all the chores, a chef cooking the meals, a gardener weeding the flower beds and Henry the butler managing it all. Every Saturday, Henry would bring her the proposed menu for the following week, she would look it over and approve it, and then everything else happened like it was on cruise control.

  She could get used to this.

  The limo turned onto the freeway and she frowned. “Where are we going?”

  “The mall,” Jason said. “Oh, not the one we went to last time. You’ve already been to the maternity shops there.”

  “Oh. Good thinking.” She tried to smile, but it came out feeling stiff. It had been yet another decision he had made without consulting her.

  On the other hand, why was she so sensitive about this? He consulted her on the big matters, usually. She had to give him credit for trying, anyway. And on something like this, she hadn’t asked which mall they would go to. It hadn’t even occurred to her that there were other options. She just always went to the closest one.

  They were heading north, and soon she realized they were going to the Galeria mall. That was an amazing place, filled with expensive stores spread over four or five stories. “I guess we’re shopping for maternity gowns?” she said, half joking.

  “Not a bad idea,” he said. “I’m starting to get feelers from some charities, and also a couple of political fund-raising dinner invitations. You need to be dressed right.”

  She stared at him. “I never imagined…”

  “It’ll become part of your life. You’ll rub elbows with the big-wigs.” He said it with such a soft, sweet smile, that she almost melted in her seat. But by now, the chauffer was pulling into a parking slot. Time for some serious shopping.

  She found a couple of nice items at Saks, and then a smaller maternity store. Then, Jason pointed to something across the wide hallway. “Oh, look. That jewelry store does one-of-a-kind rings.”

  Diane frowned. “Jason, we don’t need to do this.”

  “You want everyone to take the wedding seriously, don’t you? How are they going to do that if you have no ring, or something obviously cheap?”

  He sounded so reasonable. But it just didn’t feel right. It was the action of a rich sugar daddy keeping his mistress supplied with jewels and furs, not a dashing fiancé showing how much he loved her.

  She stood there, feet planted on the floor, staring at the store, her stomach churning. He tugged on her arm, but when she didn’t move, he let go and paced for half a minute. He was going to become upset. She’d better decide soon.

  “I’m hungry,” she said finally. “Let’s get something to eat, and that’ll also give me time to process this.”

  CHAPTER 11

  Jason took Diane to a nice seafood restaurant in the mall. Diane dithered for a while over the menu. If she was always like this, it was going to be a problem. He was a man of action, not contemplation, and her long ponderings were cramping his style.

  “Are you having trouble?”

  “I just don’t want to eat something that will trigger my morning sickness.”

  He nodded. He should have known that. “You think fish will make you sick?”

  “Maybe shellfish.”

  “Hm.” That was the best part of seafood. He loved crab cakes and shrimp. Oh, and scallops. They were the best. Not to mention oysters.

  She set her menu down. “I’m going to get the six-ounce fillet.”

  “Safe choice.” He examined the menu again. “And if I ordered crab cakes?”

  She mulled it over for a moment. “Yeah, that should be fine.”

  Her ring finger was still bare. Wha
t did he need to do to get her to agree? “So, do you want a less expensive ring? Is that the deal?”

  “I don’t know,” she said.

  “Maybe cubic zirconium?”

  That got a chuckle out of her, then she looked more serious. “Do you think people could tell?”

  “We’re not doing a fake diamond,” he said, hoping his tone was firm enough that she would realize he wouldn’t negotiate on that issue.

  “But think of it,” she said, leaning toward him like she was about to divulge a mind-blowing solution to all their problems. “If we get a cheap diamond, it’ll look cheap. But we can get a fake diamond that’s as big as a house, and everyone will think you splurged on it.”

  “Diane,” Jason said, his fingers wanted to curl into tense fists. He made an effort to keep his hands relaxed, although he couldn’t stop his little finger from twitching.

  At that point, the waiter arrived and took their orders. When the man was gone, Jason realized he’d lost track of where he had been in the conversation. He didn’t want to go back to the beginning. “So, why does this make you so uncomfortable.”

  Diane looked at the table, right where the plate was going to be, her expression solemn. “I don’t know.”

  Well, that was just peachy. How was he supposed to help her figure it out? “I can keep guessing, but I don’t know if that will help.”

  “Probably not.” She creased her brows, then said, “ask me to make something up.”

  Woah. That didn’t make any sense. But on the other hand, he figured it wouldn’t hurt. “Okay. So, suppose you knew. What would it be?”

  “Well…” She let the word trail off, sounding like she was picking ice cream flavors, not stating what was bothering her. “It might be that I know you’re going to want to buy something expensive.” Then, her mouth turned down. “That’s it.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I feel it. In my gut.”

  “Huh?”

  “It felt like something resonated down there, like my whole being went ‘gong.’” She mimed a vibrating action.

  “Interesting.” He wasn’t sure he understood what she was describing. He’d never felt anything like that. But that didn’t matter. They were making progress. So, what now? He took a sip of water, something to do while he tried to figure out what came next. “Why does an expensive gift cause a problem?”

  “Because, it’s not coming from the place where it should.” Now, she stared into his eyes, her brow slightly creased, like she was trying to figure out how to explain it. “It’s not coming from love.”

  “And if it was?”

  “It’s not.”

  “How can you know that?”

  “Because, Captain Shallow, we hardly know each other. We don’t know enough to be able to love each other.”

  “I disagree.”

  “And it’s that kind of quick ‘love’ that leads to the high divorce rate in this country.” She looked away. “And you know this will only last until your dad passes. When he’s gone, there’s nothing to keep us together.”

  “Why are you so cynical about this?”

  She gave him a look that he interpreted as disgust. Just like his dad.

  “My dad… the man who raised me… he’s not my biological father. Mom got married to my real father a few months after they’d met. Then, after she got pregnant, she started learning all kinds of things about him that bothered her.” Diane turned away, eyes back on the table, her finger rubbing softly on the tablecloth.

  “So, your mom filed for divorce?”

  “No. She was going to try to stick it out. For the child, you know?” Her laugh was hollow sounding. “But he left her first. I’ve never even met the guy.”

  “Damn.”

  “Yeah.” She let out another huff. “So, when Mom started dating again, she made sure she knew the guy well enough, and he knew her.”

  “How long did they date?”

  “About three years.”

  Jason resisted recoiling at the number. They didn’t have a fraction of that amount of time. It was crazy. “Wow,” was all he could muster.

  “And they’ve been very happy.”

  “So, what, then? You want to wait for three years before I get you a wedding ring?”

  Diane shrugged. “I guess that does sound pretty absurd.”

  “Just think of it this way. If we do finally split, you’ll have a ring you can hock for a lot of money.”

  She looked puzzled. “That doesn’t bother you? That you would have spent all that money, and then I just flippantly sell it?”

  “No.”

  “Wow.” She shook her head, her expression dazed. “I can’t even fathom that.”

  “I don’t know how to explain it any better. And I think, once your folks see the house we’re in, they’re going to expect a pretty impressive rock on your finger. If you show them a quarter carat sand grain, they’ll wonder what’s going on.”

  “So, it’s part of the deception.”

  “Unless you want to tell them right out what’s going on.”

  “I should,” she said. “But I don’t want to. Don’t want to disappoint them.”

  Jason chuckled. “And a divorce won’t do that?”

  Her face finally softened, and she leaned toward him, taking his arm in hers. “I think my mom would understand that.”

  ✽✽✽

  Diane sat on the couch in the master bedroom, staring at her hand, at the large rock glistening on her ring finger. It was truly breathtaking, and so massive she would need a bodyguard any time she was in public.

  Of course, she wouldn’t be spending time in the grocery store anymore, or tooling around Walmart. But there was school, and who-knew-what-types of people wandering around the campus.

  Best to remove her ring before heading back to class. She could put it back on when she got home. Just a safety precaution. Nothing to do with how uncomfortable it still made her feel.

  Maybe she should call her mother. Pretending to be thrilled about the engagement might help her slide into the role more comfortably.

  But no, lying to her parents felt even worse. So far, she hadn’t lied. Had she? She tried to review what she’d told them, but couldn’t remember, and anyway it wasn’t the actual telling of falsehoods she was guilty of, but of leaving out so much that should have been said.

  After all, if Jason’s father knew what the truth was, why couldn’t her parents?

  It wasn’t like they would be able to stop her. She was an adult, and nothing they did or said would change her mind. At least not unless it was illegal, and she wouldn’t go there.

  She slipped out of the room and found Jason at his interminable study station. Never any difficulty knowing where to find this man!

  “Hey, Jason?”

  He looked up, a soft smile on his face, eyelids drooping.

  She chuckled. He wasn’t going to get to her with the old bedroom eyes trick.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “Nothing.”

  He leaned back in his seat, hand dangling off the chair’s arm, eyes roving over her body. “Right. I don’t see anything funny from here.”

  She laughed again. “Well, you are a little humorous when you’re trying to pour on the sexiness.”

  His smug smile evaporated. “You know, I can go back to New York to be treated like a loser.”

  Oh, dang, she hadn’t intended to make him feel like he was listening to his damned father, or that she was criticizing him. But he sure could take it that way.

  “That’s because you don’t need to pour it on,” she said. “You’re already too sexy for your own good. Or mine, either.”

  That got him sitting up straighter. “You haven’t… haven’t…”

  “Let on? Yeah.”

  “Because you don’t…”

  “It’s like the ring. I’m just not ready.”

  “And since you’re pregnant, it wouldn’t be a good idea to get you drunk.” He gave her a sh
rug.

  “You don’t need to rely on that, either.”

  Now he huffed. “Then what will work on you?”

  “Just give me more time.”

  His eyes went glassy. “Yeah. Sure. No problem.”

  “Well,” she said, backing out of the door, “Good night.”

  “Wait!” he said, jumping up and rushing toward her. When he reached her, she stiffened, not because she felt threatened. Oh no. Because her body was trying to move toward him, her arms wanted to reach out and wrap themselves around his waist, and her mouth wanted to join with his. “Can I at least have a good night kiss?”

  She didn’t know if she dared. Her entire fortress could come crashing down, and her ability to resist would be washed away like wood-framed houses in a tsunami.

  He put his hand on her cheek, and let his fingers softly electrify her skin as they moved so slowly and softly. His head bent toward her. His lips came closer.

  “Every time I see you,” he whispered, “you are more beautiful than the last.”

  Her breath stilled as their lips met and his arms pulled her toward him. She pressed herself against him, compressing her breasts as they met his chest. An electric thrill surged through her body. She was about to lift her leg and rub the outside of his thigh with the inside of hers.

  She stomped the errant foot back onto the floor. Her hands pressed him away. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to get your hopes up like that.”

  His face stayed still, and she knew he was fighting disappointment. “You’re killing me.”

  She waited, expecting him to beg and plead, or to lean in and try another kiss. But, amazingly, he respected her boundaries. “I’m sorry,” she said again.

  He dropped his hands to his side. “You’d better go now, while I can still control myself.”

  At that, she had to chuckle. “Don’t be ridiculous. You have iron control.”

  His brows lifted.

  “But I’ll leave. Because it’s what will make things easier on you.”

  With that, she walked back to her own room. When she finally got under the covers for the night, she grabbed her second pillow and wrapped her arms around it. It had been a narrow miss.